The way those hippies look, you can't tell the boys from the girls! Ha ha ha! I saw a girl yesterday, she was pregnant. Had her whole belly showin' and ya' know what she had painted on it? "Love Child"! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

When we lose one we love, our bitterest tears are called forth by the memory of hours when we loved not enough.

I have marked A thousand blushing apparitions To start into her face, a thousand innocent shames In angel whiteness beat away those blushes, And in her eye there hath appeared a fire To burn the errors that these princes hold Against her maiden truth.

Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.

Beware of the man of one book.

Republicans are men of narrow vision, who are afraid of the future.

Questions focus our thinking. Ask empowering questions like: What's good about this? What's not perfect about it yet? What am I going to do next time? How can I do this and have fund doing it?

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.

The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.

Irony is the hygiene of the mind.

Autopsy is a dying practice.

To my purist trout fishing friends, bass are lowly green fish and brown fish. To me, bass are bent rods and aching arms. To my ex wife, bass are the bewilderment of addiction.

The American people want to preserve their American heritage, and they have the quaint belief that public lands belong to them as much as to the people of the state where the lands are located.

He that is conscious of guilt cannot bear the innocence of others: So they will try to reduce all others to their own level.

Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.

I will play the swan, And die in music.

The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own. -Benjamin Disraeli.

We see spiders, flies or ants entombed and preserved forever in amber, a more than royal tomb.

It is necessary; therefore, it is possible.

You've reached middle age when the phone rings on Saturday night, you pray it isn't for you.