I stand and listen to people speaking french in the stores and in the street. It's such a pert, crisp language, elegant as ruffling taffeta.

My love is like a cabbage, divided into two, The leaves I give to others but the heart I give to you.

Much madness is divinest sense To a discerning eye; Much sense the starkest madness. 'Tis the majority In this, as all, prevails Assent, and you are sane; Demur,--you're straightway dangerous, And handled with a chain.

The way to the heart is through the ears. Thanks to John Travis -Katie Hurley.

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason.

For target shooting, that's okay. Get a license and go to the range. For defense of the home, that's why we have police departments.

Changing our diet is something we choose to do, not something we are forced to do. Instead of dreading it, try saying, "Here's another thing I get to do to help myself. Great!".

Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.

How awful to reflect that what people say of us is true!

A good old man, sir; he will be talking: as they say, When the age is in the wit is out. -Much Ado about Nothing. Act iii. Sc. 5.

Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true.

The Stag in the Ox-Stall A stag, roundly chased by the hounds and blinded by fear to the danger he was running into, took shelter in a farmyard and hid himself in a shed among the oxen. An Ox gave him this kindly warning: O unhappy creature! why should you thus, of your own accord, incur destruction and trust yourself in the house of your enemy?' The Stag replied: Only allow me, friend, to stay where I am, and I will undertake to find some favorable opportunity of effecting my escape. At the approach of the evening the herdsman came to feed his cattle, but did not see the Stag; and even the farm-bailiff with several laborers passed through the shed and failed to notice him. The Stag, congratulating himself on his safety, began to express his sincere thanks to the Oxen who had kindly helped him in the hour of need. One of them again answered him: We indeed wish you well, but the danger is not over. There is one other yet to pass through the shed, who has as it were a hundred eyes, and until he has come and gone, your life is still in peril. At that moment the master himself entered, and having had to complain that his oxen had not been properly fed, he went up to their racks and cried out: Why is there such a scarcity of fodder? There is not half enough straw for them to lie on. Those lazy fellows have not even swept the cobwebs away. While he thus examined everything in turn, he spied the tips of the antlers of the Stag peeping out of the straw. Then summoning his laborers, he ordered that the Stag should be seized and killed.

What is the city but the people?

Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that has been dropped out of a helicopter.

The last 7 words of a dying church: "We never did it like that before".

The general tendency of things throughout the world is to render mediocrity the ascendant power among mankind.

And to his eye There was but one beloved face on earth, And that was shining on him.

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" till you can find a rock.

How bless'd, how envied, were our life, Could we but scape the poulterer's knife! But man, curs'd man, on Turkeys preys, And Christmas shortens all our days: Sometimes with oysters we combine, Sometimes assist the savory chine; From the low peasant to the lord, The Turkey smokes on every board.

Despite everybody who has been born and has died, the world has just gone on. I mean, look at Napoleon --but we went right on. Look at Harpo Marx --the world went around, it didn't stop for a second. It's sad but true. John Kennedy, right?