Better to get up late and be wide awake than to get up early and be asleep all day.

"Orthodoxy, my Lord,: said Bishop Warburton, in a whisper,-- "orthodoxy is my doxy,--heterodoxy is another man's doxy."

Oh, shame to men! devil with devil damn'd Firm concord holds, men only disagree Of creatures rational.

In the bonds of Death He lay Who for our offence was slain; But the Lord is risen to-day, Christ hath brought us life again, Wherefore let us all rejoice, Singing loud, with cheerful voice, Hallelujah!

Of my merit On that pint you yourself may jedge: All is, I never drink no sperit, Nor I haint never signed no pledge.

He who hangs on the errors of the ignorant multitude, must not be counted among great men.

A foursome of senior golfers hit the course with waning enthusiasm for the sport."These hills are getting steeper as the years go by," one complained."These fairways seem to be getting longer too," wheezed a second."And somehow, the sand traps seem to be bigger than I remember 'em too," said the third.Hearing just about enough from his buddies, the oldest, and the wisest of the foursome at 87-years-old, piped up and said, "Oh my friends, just be thankful we're still on THIS side of the grass!".

quotes

I find it valid to understand man as an animal before I am prepared to know him as a man.

People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty.

There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.

Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle that fits them all.

It's wiser being good than bad; It's safer being meek than fierce: It's fitter being sane than mad. My own hope is, a sun will pierce The thickest cloud earth ever stretched; That, after Last, returns the First, Though a wide compass round be fetched; That what began best, can't end worst, Nor what God blessed once, prove accurst.

It is impossible for a man to be cheated by anyone but himself.

My days are swifter than a weaver's shuttle, and are spent without hope.

Children have more need of models than of critics.

Bless thee, Bottom! bless thee! thou art translated. -A Midsummer Night's Dream. Act iii. Sc. 1.

Woman is not born: she is made. In the making, her humanity is destroyed. She becomes symbol of this, symbol of that: mother of the earth, slut of the universe; but she never becomes herself because it is forbidden for her to do so.

I am sorry to say that there is too much point to the wisecrack that life is extinct on other planets because their scientists were more advanced than ours.

Mingle a little folly with your wisdom; a little nonsense now and then is pleasant.