Over 40,000 Famous Quotes Sorted By Topic and Author

In your life you will love someone so much you could eat them, then you will get married and wish you had.

I once saw this sign on a diner wall: "I have an agreement with the bank: they don't fry hamburgers, and I don't cash checks.".

I only work to enjoy when I am not working.

I refuse to engage in an intellectual battle with an unarmed man.

I ran up the door, closed the stairs, said my pajamas, put on my prayers, turned off the bed, jumped in my light, all because you kissed me goodnight.

I rather lose a second in my life, than my life in a second.

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I "had" any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

"Is ignorance or apathy the biggest problem with the world today?" "I don't know and I don't care".

Karl Marx's Mother: If Karl, instead of writing a lot about capital, had made a lot of it ... it would have been much better.

Keep your head and your heart in the right direction and you will not have to worry about your feet.

Keep your head in the clouds.. you're the first to know when it rains, and it's easier to see the silver lining.

Killing time murders opportunities.

Kindness: a language the deaf can hear, the blind can see, and the mute can speak.

Knowledge is that which is acquired by learning. Wisdom is knowing what to do with it?

Last night I dreamed my life was done, and heaven's gates flung wide. And with kindly grace, an angel ushered me inside. And there stood those I'd shunned or judged unworthy or unclean. Indignant words rose to my lips, but never were set free, On every face showed stunned surprise: no one expected me.

Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it!

Laughter is like changing a baby's diaper. It doesn't permanently solve any problems, but it makes thing more acceptable for awhile.

Laughter is the brush that sweeps away the cobwebs of the heart.

Laughter is the jam on the toast of life; it adds flavour, keeps it from becoming too dry, and makes it easier to swallow.

Lazy ness is the only luxury that not even a millionaire can afford.