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Humour has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.

Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever.

Those who are serious in ridiculous matters will be ridiculous in serious matters.

We never respect those who amuse us, however we may smile at their comic powers.

A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.

The real reason for comedy is to hide the pain.

A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.

Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.

The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

a Christmas tree .. the perfect gift for a guy... the plant is already dead .

Is anything besides the mind ever boggled?

There's a woman in China having a baby every 6 minutes. They're trying to find her to stop her.

A rich man's joke is always funny.

Humore is an affirmation of man's dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.

Humor is not a postscript or an incidental afterthought; it is a serious and weighty part of the world's economy. One feels increasingly the height of the faculty in which it arises, the nobility of things associated with it, and the greatness of services it renders. - Oscar Firkins: Memoirs and Letters.

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. - Points of View.

I said that Sean Hannity took residence up Newt Gingrich's butt from 94 to 98. I got that from British intelligence. It turns out he only took up residence in 95.

Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law.

When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.