Over 40,000 Famous Quotes Sorted By Topic and Author

If you don't learn to laugh at troubles, you won't have anything to laugh at when you grow old.

Miss Piggy to Johnny Carson .. do you think I am Oscar material? Johnny Carson: Oscar Mayer maybe NBC Tonight Show writers http://www.mad-cow.org.

WARNING: Humor may be hazardous to your illness.

He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.

In the end, everything is a gag.

With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.

He who laughs, lasts.

That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.

Nobody ever died of laughter.

Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at.

I am no longer a curmudgeon. I am a curmudgeon emeritus.

Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.

Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.

Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. - Inward Ho.

The seal went into the restaurant and was asked by the waiter if he would like a Canadian Club on the rocks. He replied no thank you.

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

My mother was awarded the Serbian medal of freedom for raising 3 dysfunctional Croatian sons.

If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.