Over 40,000 Famous Quotes Sorted By Topic and Author

Call no man your father upon the earth, for one is your Father, which is in heaven.

The government is becoming the family of last resort.

Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.

Show me a frigid women and, nine times out of ten, I'll show you a little man.

In the past decade or so, the women's magazines have taken to running home-handyperson articles suggesting that women can learn to fix things just as well as men. These articles are apparently based on the ludicrous assumption that _men_ know how to fix things, when in fact all they know how to do is _look_ at things in a certain squinty-eyed manner, which they learned in Wood Shop; eventually, when enough things in the home are broken, they take a job requiring them to transfer to another home.

You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they get older.

Cautious, careful people, always casting about to preserve their reputations ... can never effect a reform. -Susan B. Anthony.

Families are about love overcoming emotional torture.

Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family does too.

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.

A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another.".

All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.

He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.

Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.