Over 40,000 Famous Quotes Sorted By Topic and Author

Just as women are afraid of receiving, men are afraid of giving.

Every theory of love, from Plato down teaches that each individual loves in the other sex what he lacks in himself.

The kind of power mothers have is enormous. Take the skyline of Istanbul -- enormous breasts, pathetic little willies, a final revenge on Islam. I was so scared I had to crouch in the bottom of the boat when I saw it.

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not.

Few misfortunes can befall a boy which bring worse consequences than to have a really affectionate mother.

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.

Only a few human beings should grow to the square mile; they are commonly planted too close.

Some people can stay longer in an hour than others can in a week.

The person who can be only serious or only cheerful, is but half a man.

Such a wife as I want... must be young, handsome I lay most stress upon a good shape, sensible a little learning will do, well-bread, chaste, and tender. As to religion, a moderate stock will satisfy me. She must believe in God and hate a saint.

Good women always think it is their fault when someone else is being offensive. Bad women never take the blame for anything.

They talk about a woman's sphere, as though it had a limit. There's not a place in earth or heaven. There's not a task to mankind given... without a woman in it.

A small family is soon provided for.

Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around her neck 'Lay on Top of Me Or I'll Die.' I didn't know what I was gonna do....".

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

Is it better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves.

I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year.

Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.

Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.